you gotta be

If I ever date again, which, come on, let's be real, track record hasn't been that great, these qualities must be met.  Hell, maybe if I'd have adhered to them, I would've dated more than a cumulative 22 months out of the past 7 years (84 months).  Go ahead, do the math.  Fine, slack ass, I'll do it for you: over the past 7 years, I've spent approximately 74% of it single.  And you know what, it suits me a lot better that way.


But, IF, I even decide to date again these are the criteria that have to be met and no, it's not up for debate:

1. At least 6' feet
2. No red hair
3. Compatible in horoscope world
4. 30-35
5. No dogs
6. Good grammar
7. No kids
8. Never married
9. Country fried
10. Gets along well w family
11. Will consider kids
12. Has at least a 4 yr degree
13. Cuddle me up
14. No ugly feet
15. Well kept fingernails
16.  Extremely sarcastic
17. Clean
18. Is not in a ridiculous amount of debt
19. No Cubs fans
20. No mental illness in family history
21. No drinker/not a huge drinker
22. Respects my bubble
23. emotionally available
24. Let's me call the shots
25. Stable job history
26. Potential to make money
27. Likes sports
28. No Duke fans