Sufi for the soul

"God long ago drew a circle in the sand around the spot where you are now.


I was never not coming here.


This was never not going to happen."


Damn it.

Tightrope

I try really hard to stay in the moment.  This moment.  Not the one the just before or the one just after.  This exact moment.  The exact moment that is over as soon as you think it because it's the next moment and not the current moment.  So, is there ever a current moment?  Does the present actually exist?  Maybe there's just the past and the future.  The past that's already happened and the future that hasn't.  That's not very comforting.

I believe everything happens for a reason.  I believe that all of our actions are already planned out, whether by God or a higher power or the universe.  I usually say "God" because it's a catch all.  We'll save that "God" talk for another time.  With that said, I think everything that I do (and that you do) is "God's will" because everything is already planned out, so how could it not be "God's will?"  I can't tell you why I believe that.  I can't tell you that I read something somewhere or someone told me something once that made me believe in all this.  It's just a feeling.  A gut feeling that this is the way it is.  I accept that I could be wrong, I also accept that I could be right.

So, if everything happens for a reason then why would we worry about anything?  It's all going to work out or not work out right?  Either way, we'll be ok.  That's easy to say yet in the moment (that we've established may or may not even exist) it's hard to actually do.

I'm glad we cleared that up.

Magic 8 ball

How do you know when you get there if you don't know where you're going?  I don't know, you just do.  How do I know?  Because it's happened to me.  I didn't know I was looking for something until I stumbled upon it one day and it changed my life.

I don't really like surprises.  What if you are really excited about this surprise you have planned for me and I don't like it?  Then I would feel like I would have to pretend to like it which would give you a false impression of who I really am and we just can't have that.  So, don't surprise me with something unless you are absolutely sure that I'll love it.  (safe bets: Tiffany or a trip to Fiji or Manolos)

In job interviews they sometimes ask "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?"  I know what they want you to say.  I'm the type of person that thinks, dude, I don't even know what I'm doing tomorrow, which may never even come, so let's just focus on the moment that we have.  I'm pretty sure that's not what they want to hear.

Some people "see" their lives a certain way.  They "see" themselves getting married,  having kids, and living in the burbs.  Or they "see" themselves being some high powered exec in NYC and making a ton of money.  I don't have that.  That vision.  I don't "see" myself anywhere and I'm ok with being surprised with life.

I used to be jealous of the people that had visions of their lives.  But really what's the point of wondering about the future when it's not promised to you?  Maybe I've just always got one foot on the ground and by protecting my heart truly I got lost in the sounds I hear in my mind.  Or there's always the chance that I'm the king of wishful thinking....